Oh Kris Jenner, Oh Kris Jenner, Whoring kids out since ’07! Oh Kris Jenner, Oh Kris Jenner, You have no place in Heaven! Money-hungry barracuda1, Watch your daughters pose nude-a! Oh…

They came upon Kim’s sex tape, That glorious footage of old, Of Ray-J bending Kim over, To touch her heart of gold. “Peace on the earth, good will to Kris, There…

You know Kimmy and Kourtney and Mason and Northie Don’t get me started on Kendall and Kylie. But do you recall The most real Kardashian of all? Khloe, the drunkest Kardash Also has…

Hark! Kourtney’s annoying, Scott’s heartstrings- she’s always toying! Cut the cord and find a black dude, Then you’ll fit in with the brood! Kim takes heat but your voice sucks, Without…

The First North West, your mother did say, Your dad is a shithead, his name’s Kanye. I can’t believe I married this creep, On a warm Italian day, and nothing was cheap.…

Sainty Baby, slip your mom my phone number, please, oh please. Been an awful good girl. Sainty Baby, just get Bev’s digits into the phone. Sainty Baby, Mom and Bev are drunk…

OK, here it is, my pals. Day One. Or Day Twelve. Whatever. The first installment of The Twelve Days of Kimsmas, and we throw it back to one of the biggest…

I’ve got an early holiday present for you all. An all new series of posts that I may be more proud of than I am of F.A.F., and I freakin’ love…